Another part of Active Participation was the view that healing was a private, personal experience. People, events and environmental conditions were experienced as relevant to healing but each individual seemed to want to direct the process of their healing in their own way. Friends and family were appreciated for their support, but at a distance. It was nice to know they were out there sending cards, calling and praying for them but each participant seemed to want to do what was necessary on their own and in their own way. All the participants had some thoughts about the privacy of this experience.
Outside influences were not dismissed as irrelevant to healing, but there was a very strong desire to do it themselves and not to have requirements put on them from the outside. Emphasis on Uniqueness. Another theme related to Active Participation was a belief of each participant that they and their healing were unique. It seemed the participants did not want to be categorized with other people. Each person seemed to believe that no matter how many people had come before them, this was a unique experience, different form all others.
They could learn form other people’s experiences but they wanted to be recognized as unique. Attitude Heals. By far the most persistent idea expressed by the participants was that the nature of one’s attitude was essential to healing. The most common belief was that one’s attitude must be positive for a positive healing outcome. Attitudes that were defined as positive included: determination, acceptance, patience, hope, and optimism. Attitudes thought to be negative and therefore detrimental to healing included blame, feeling sorry for oneself, discouragement, and resignation.
Attitude was considered to be a part of healing over which the participant could exercise some control. All the participants belied a positive attitude was important in healing and many of them worked to achieve this attitude. Changing from a negative to a positive was difficult at times, but participants who found themselves thinking negatively attempted to make this change. Achieving Balance The second theme was Achieving Balance. Participants described their mind and body as dichotomous with each part healing at a different rate.
They wanted to integrate these “parts. ” Many participants’ struggles to achieve a balance between overdoing and underdoing. Balance was also reflected in a struggle with dependence and independence, control and uncontrol, imagining progress and accepting limitations, and gaining as positive attitude versus focusing upon doubts, Mind-Body Incongruence. All participants spoke of a connection between their minds and their bodies. For many participants this connection was experienced as being out of balance during this healing experience.
The mind and the body healed at different rates or where perceived as going in different directions. Immediately following the surgery both the mind and the body were unable or unwilling to do much beyond resting and sleeping. Often either the mind or the body was ready to increase its functioning at different time than the other. So the mind could be ready to go out and to do things before the body was ready to cooperate or the body could feel great but the mental strain of work could still be too much. The balance between the mind and the body is closely connected with Active Participation.
Participants believed they actively restored their balance through their attitude, accurate reading of messages from the body, maintenance of physical health, and being sensitive to signs of imbalance. Overdoing and Underdoing. How does one tell whether one is overdoing or not doing enough to facilitate healing? This was a dilemma for many participants since they believed that they could indeed influence healing and it was important to find the balance. Achieving balance was a major gaol. Participants wanted to push themselves enough to facilitate healing yet not so much that they caused a setback, thus slowing the process.
“Overdoing” often appeared to result from an intense desire to do something to enhance the healing process. When this desire was frustrated the individual was more likely to disrupt the balance by becoming tense. Evolving Beyond The third major theme of healing was the process of evolving beyond the specific recovery form this surgery. Participants sought meaning from their experience. They often reviewed past decisions and examined their lifestyle and values. The contemplated changing gaols and priorities. The experience expanded beyond healing form this specific surgery into a process of life healing.