Childhood development is something that occurs in all walks of life, regardless of whether or not the environment is ‘normal’ or not. The development of children is therefore dependent on the environment into which they are socialized as well as the inherent personality they might have inherited. The study of normal childhood development has been widely studied, but there are differences in the way that children from broken homes develop emotionally.
The two schools of thought that study the development of children are that of acquired knowledge and social theory, both have opposing ideas of how the children acquire knowledge about the outside world. Problem behavior of children from broken homes manifest themselves in a number of ways that are not considered ‘normal’, by virtue of the fact that they are exposed to dissention in the home and at times, outright conflict. Many studies have attempted to understand how the disturbances in childhood development changes in the emotional sense because that is where the most abnormal behavior is seen.
Three of the conditions that affect emotional behavior are marital relationships; mothers mental state and parental attitudes (Barnes, 1995: 57). In these cases misdirected emotions are manifested in unusual behaviors, such as neurosis , temper tantrums and fearfulness (Barnes, 1995: 57). In a research study conducted by Richman et al, 40% of problem behaviors were observed in children living with parents in poor marital conditions. This was compared to only 19% of children in the control group.
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The mother’s mental state also has a substantial effect on the emotional state of the child, with 39% of mother’s reporting depression (Barnes, 1995: 57). As a result of ‘bad’ behavior in these situations, the parents became irritated and frustrated by the child’s behavior, losing control at times and not being able to maintain adequate control of the child (Barnes, 1995: 58). Causes of this behavior are seen to be developmental disturbances where parental hostility and ambivalence detract from the normal social processes that influence the way that emotion is perceived by the child (Barnes, 1995: 58).
On a theoretical basis, Erikson derived 8 stages of development in children that consisted of hope; will; purpose; competence; fidelity; love; care and wisdom (Child Development Institute, 2008). The first stage that is commonly called the hope stage is also termed the basic trust versus mistrust, is the stage that in Freudian psychology would be the oral stage, or stage where the child is nurtured and loved. If the child is handled properly they become trusting and secure while if they were mishandled, they develop insecurity (Child Development Institute, 2008).
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In the age group of 3-4 years, the child develops in the area of will or autonomy versus shame. In good parental situations, the child will come out confident and self assured but if they are socialized with a great deal of shame, the child is negative (Child Development Institute, 2008). Initiative versus guilt (purpose); and industry versus inferiority (competence) are the stages that are most pertinent to this study in particular because this is where the child develops their ideas of who they are (Child Development Institute, 2008).
However, emotional development is not seen in stages as much as it is seen as a part of development as a whole. Hypothesis The subject of this paper is to determine the effect of broken homes on the way in which children manifest and reflect emotion. The hypothesis is thus that children’s emotions are misdirected in cases where homes are dysfunctional or where the family is broken and that these mal-adaptations contribute to problem behavior. Method: In order to test this hypothesis, the subject concerned is an eight year old male whose parents divorced at four years ago under stressful circumstances.
The child will be observed in a number of situations and circumstances. Parents are interviewed as well as brief interludes with the child and family friends with whom the child is often in contact. Results: Thomas* is eight years old and his parents have been separated for a little over 4 years. His mother is remarried and has a child with her new husband while his father is also now in a long term relationship but has no other children. His mother has custody of him but he sees his father every other weekend. Previous observations relate that Thomas is difficult to control at school, that he is disruptive and aggressive.
Thomas has been known to react with aggression towards articles that belong to his step-father whenever his mother and the stepfather have altercations, also refusing discipline from his stepfather. His mother’s new marriage is observed to have as much conflict as his parents had when they were still together, resulting in the fact that Thomas is still reflecting aggression towards his parents behavior. On observation, Thomas has a challenging relationship with his mother, who attempts to discipline him but has no paternal back-up.
Out of frustration she is given to shouting at him but at times gives up because her new son is sickly and requires a great deal of attention. Strangely enough the new child receives attention only when he is sick with minimal amounts of affection directed essentially out of love. In his father’s home the situation is similar in that his stepmother is a peace-loving, quiet type who ‘does not think it is her place to discipline him’ and is not permitted to do so by her husband. Thomas begins writhing on the ground and sliding up and down when attention is not directed at him, possibly in an attempt to disturb whatever the adults are doing.
When the television is not tuned into cartoons, he sits and sulks and snaps at anyone who asks him a question. He is also given to ordering his father around, demanding to do what he wants and his father indulges him. He reacts with ambivalence towards the stepmother when she attempts to be affectionate or caring. Upon interview with the stepmother, it is ascertained that he screams for his father from his bedroom to make him get up at hours between 3:30 am and 4:00 am. He is excessively fearful, wanting to sleep with his father, sometimes causing his stepmother to sleep on the couch in the lounge.
His father is neurotic in case he scratches or hurts himself causing him to become that way too. He is scared to go to the kitchen by himself to get a glass of water. Interviewing his mother was interesting because she stated that there were no problems at all in the home and that she thought Thomas was ‘doing’ fine. However, when interviewing the friends with whom he stays quite often, it was ascertained that life at home was not pleasant and that his mother and stepfather fought regularly in front of the children.
Whenever this occurred, the younger son would become seriously ill and at the age of three has only just begun walking. The mother appears to be ignoring any problems with her children but did state that Thomas is her favorite and that she will not hear ‘a bad word about him’. Discussion: As discussed in the introduction, the mental state of the mother affects the child’s emotional development as much as the dysfunctional home situation does and this is seen in this situation as well. Integrating the biological and the social theories helps us to understand better why these characteristics are being shown by the child.
The stage which we are studying in Erikson’s terms is the stage of purpose and competency. Thomas is being given nurturing but not boundaries. He has become confused as to what it is he is supposed to be doing and when to do what. Sociologically he has learnt that because of his parents fear for his happiness or safety, all he has to do is act on these fears, to get what he wants. This is kind of operant conditioning is useful to the child but not healthy because as the use of this manipulation becomes engrained, the social environments he has to encounter do not respond to these techniques.
The stress factor of the divorce itself marks a period in the child’s life when the parents who represent security are suddenly not together and the means they would have used for comfort have been torn from them. They thus have to find another way to comfort and secure themselves, which can be emotional or even pathological. In one study, children were shown film clips that measured their level of empathy and revealed that children from divorced homes were more impulsive and aggressive, having issues with discipline and authority (Damon et al, 2006: 144).
It became increasingly clear that both parents feel guilty because of the break-up which was unpleasant. Thomas is observed to do the opposite to what he is asked; for example, he had a nose-bleed and threw his bloody tissues on the lounge floor. When his stepmother asked him to pick it up and throw it is in the toilet, he went and threw it in the egg-basket with the eggs, next to the dustbin. Thomas is therefore showing his distaste for discipline by his actions rather than his words.
Emotional stages as opposed to developmental stages are dependent of stimuli to which the child reacts and organizes these reactions (Sroufe 1997: 67-68). In this manner, the child expresses emotion through its opposite’s anger-joy; love-hate; happiness-sadness. The study therefore of abnormal manifestation of emotions surrounding broken homes and divorce situations, is centered around how emotions are misdirected and the child is unable to show emotion in the way that normal children are able to. Conclusion:
Thomas is definitely affected by his parents split but also by the lack of discipline, he is also deeply affected by the disruptive attachments he has had to form. Not only is he separated from his father for long periods, but he also has difficulty accepting his new paternal role model. Attachments are formed from birth and are meant to derive some form of emotional stability (Simpson and Rholes, 1998: 189). When that stability is broken, the stage of trust versus mistrust is challenged and the child reacts out of rebellion for the fact that he no longer has anyone he feels he can trust.
The situation of divorce, forces the child to formulate new ways of reorganizing emotions and make sense of the reasons why their parents have split (National Research Council, 1984: 110). This may result in a number of rebellious activities and proves that there is a relationship between emotional development and living in a divorced or broken home situation. Bibliography: Barnes, Peter. (1995). Personal, Social and Emotional Development of Children. Wiley-Blackwell. Damon, William et al. (2006). Handbook of Child Psychology: Social, emotional, and personality development.
John Wiley and Sons. Child Development Institute. (2008). Stages of Social-Emotional Development in Children and Teenagers. http://www. childdevelopmentinfo. com/development/erickson. shtml National Research Council. (1984). Development During Middle Childhood: the years from six and twelve. National Academies Press. Simpson, Jeffry. A. and Rholes, William Steven. (1998). Attachment Theory and Close Relationships. Guilford Press. Shroufe, Alan. (1997). Emotional Development: the organization of emotional life in the early years. Cambridge University Press.